She is amazing. She looks at me, and I can just feel that she loves me...and she trusts me...I can't explain it. There's something in her eyes. I don't know if it is because I know she's the last one I'll ever have and I'm trying to soak it all in or if it's because she's a girl or what. There is a connection I have never felt before. Don't get me wrong, my boys and I are very close, and they all love their mommy as I do them. I would not trade any of them for the world (although I'm willing to negotiate an over-nighter if you're interested).
I just can't say enough how blessed I feel to have Maya.
And to have Luke. His sense of humor is really blossoming. I love his new laugh. I call it that because he's learned irony and every time he gets tickled at something ironic he has a new, unique laugh. It's high pitched and short, and he keeps right on going with his story without missing a beat. It's great seeing him develop into a young man.
And I love Drew. Drew is....well, he's Drew. He's a special little boy who loves everyone and says anything that comes to his head. And I mean anything. It makes him real and honest and open, and I love that. He is also just like me in some ways when I was a kid. He gets so attached to people on TV. It's emotional for him. I was and am still that way. I remember watching a mini series in an old house that had a "blue room" which is what we called it. The last night of the series was on Sunday, and I needed to go to bed for school in the morning. The series had Mickey Roonie in it and his character was Ben, who was a mentally handicapped person. Dad wanted me to go to bed and there was still about an hour left of the last show. I cried genuinely because I wanted to know what would happen to Ben. It honestly wasn't because I didn't want to go to bed. I remember feeling so distraught that I wouldn't be able to see it. Dad let me stay up when he realized it was genuine. Drew is the same way. He's emotionally involved with the "victims" of movies. I love seeing pieces of me in my kids, as silly as some of those pieces are.
And Evan is the most sensitive pleaser I know. He just wants you to love him and be proud of him. I guess that is true of all children, but Evan verbalizes it. He wants your approval for EVERYTHING, and he's not satisfied if you don't say it. He asks all the time, "Am I being good, Mommy?" He's also the most considerate. He gives away his stuff, he wants to buy presents for EVERYONE (even Santa - no joke), and he will do things for others just because he knows it's nice. It's endearing.
Gabriel is finding himself. I love who he has found. The shy little boy that never said a word for 3 years found language and clowning all at the same time in year 4! He'll do anything for a laugh. He is cute, and he knows it. His latest thing is overexaggerated laughter. It's not loud, it just goes on and on. You can tickle him and he'll make these huge movements and laughs...and when you stop, he's still moving and laughing with the same gusto.
Kids are great. It's true.
Drew and Evan lost teeth last week. Drew lost 2 on Thanksgiving Day within about 5 minutes of each other. Evan lost one the next day. Talk about breaking the Tooth Fairy's bank!!
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