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Maya Hope
Maya Hope
Hits
Boys
August 3, 2007
Dad & Gabriel 7/06 Maryland
EWC Youth Building
About Me
- mi*chelle
- I am a Christian, a Mommy, a wife, a worship leader, and a teacher....there's not much time for other things.... :)
4 comments:
not wierd, normal. it's hard not to have an "anniversary" every single month of that day. it was an extremely significant event of your life. i don't think it's any more wierd or unusual than when new couples mark the days or weeks since their first date, counting how many days old the new baby is, etc. the only difference i see is that the latter is marking what is considered to be joyous occasions by all and the former is marking a time of tremendous sorrow and loss for us, although infinite joy for him.
well at least i'm normal in one person's eyes! :) ha
Sometimes the dreams aren't what you hope for. Mine are snapshots and memories of hospital, the last night, and funeral. I've have awakened with tears in my eyes. I've literally cried in my sleep. I struggle when people say they can feel him around. I haven't felt that and would give anything to. I can hear him singing. I can close my eyes and see him. But I can't feel his presence. Anything...
i dreamed a lot about mom while going through chemo, surgeries, hospital stays, etc. i had one, count it ONE, dream about mom after she was gone. i don't remember how long after she was gone before i had it, but it had been quite awhile, probably a couple months.
mom was in her hospital bed and invited me to lay with her, like a small child again and she held me close. i felt so warm and loved and safe, i never wanted to leave. i had my mommy back. after awhile, mom said it was time for her to go and kissed me. i woke up instantly after that, bawling, and spent the day (and many more following) crying. i have NEVER dreamed about her again. i have tried and tried, but can't.
a few days after this good-bye dream, i remembered mom telling me about when her gramma died that she was close to. she said she had had a dream where her gramma came and told her good bye and that she wouldn't see her anymore. mom never dreamed of her again.
do i believe it was actually mom in my dream saying goodbye to me? or do i believe it was my own subconscious remembering what she'd told me once and doing the same for me? i dunno. either way, i'd still take the dreams just to feel close to her again.
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